What Sports Would Iron Man, Superman, Wolverine and Thor Play?

June 5th 2013, 4:56 pm

What would happen if teams could recruit superheroes from this summer's Hollywood blockbusters? Let's just say you'd have the ultimate all-star lineup!

wolverine as an hnl defenseman
Wolverine as an NHL defenseman

Sports Strengths: Born in Alberta, Canada, Wolverine is a mutant with superhuman senses. His razor-sharp fangs and claws make him an intimidating blueliner.

Sports Weaknesses: Wolverine is always at war with his own animal nature. He is prone to trash-talking and fits of rage — which means he usually ends up in the penalty box.

Secret Skill: His healing ability. Wolverine is able to recover from any hard hit, cut, bruise, broken bone, or missing tooth faster than a mere mortal.

The Wolverine opens on July 26.

Thor as a Big League Slugger

Sports Strengths: Thor is a powerful ancient god who possesses superhuman endurance — a big advantage during a long and grueling baseball season. As one of the founding members of the Avengers, he is also a strong team player.

Sports Weaknesses: Brash and hotheaded, Thor has a tendency to get himself into trouble, especially since there's no arguing balls and strikes in baseball.

Secret Skill: Who needs a bat when you have a hammer? His signature weapon makes Thor an ideal designated hitter.

Thor: The Dark World opens on November 8.

Iron Man as a Golfer

Sports Strengths: Tony Stark's man-of-leisure attitude and his genius engineering skills make him well-suited for success on the back nine.

Sports Weaknesses: The billionaire turned superhero gets distracted by parties, superfans, and expensive gear.

Secret Skill: Stark controls all the devices within his armor — from his jet boots to his laser beams — through the "cybernetic helmet" in his Iron Man suit. It also enables him to control the speed and direction of his drives and putts with pinpoint accuracy.

Iron Man 3 is now playing.